If you’d told me six months ago that I would one day thoroughly enjoy a movie about Olivia Colman gleefully making love to a pile of wicker in the shape of a man, I might not believe you. But that was exactly the case when I saw Alex Huston Fischer and Eleanor Wilson’s new film Wicker this weekend, co-starring Alexander Skarsgård, Peter Dinklage, and Elizabeth Debicki. Below, find absolutely every thought I had while watching Wicker.
LOL, I just mistook Black Bear’s production-company title card for the first frame of the movie. Is that...wicker, perchance? Never have I been so excited to see a textile.
Wearing a wicker backpack! Thinking about Max from Happy Endings calling a wicker bassinet a “whisker basket.” I wish my studio apartment in Hollywood had a stone fireplace. We gotta bring back giant, elaborate, beekeeper-ish wedding veils.
I don’t totally get what’s going on with these wicker eggs, but then again, I was opening my peanut butter M&Ms at what may have been a crucial time. I would watch 10 time-lapsed hours of Peter Dinklage’s adorable forest cottage being built on Instagram Reels. He’s making her a husband!
Out of what, I wonder? 🤔 Are we sure a man is a “perfect being”? Because as someone currently dating in Los Angeles, I beg to differ. Not Wickerxander Skarsgård!
Damn, he’s really creaky. The wicker man is a bottom? I love Olivia’s little curly pageboy.
Extract — continue reading at the source.
