While we may actually be Millennials and Gen X, it’s become clear that the kids think we are … old. As I lay on my bed with one of my teens next to me, laughing over a Reel before we forward it to my mom, I find myself suddenly the butt of a joke. That’s so unc.” I paused, hovered over the sharing airplane, and looked at the seemingly normal (to me) way that I am tapping my phone.
Was I acting like an old lady? Was I “unc,” the new gender-neutral uncle-derived slang term the teens currently use to describe anyone annoyingly older than them? After a moment of denial, I settled into the belief that my kid was actually right: I am old.
No, not as old as my parents or as old as most U.S. politicians, but when it comes to the benchmarks that define age, I am decidedly more crotchety than I was five years ago. Today, as I sit in my dining room typing this missive on the morning of my 43rd birthday (Yes, I am an geriatric millennial), I am faced with two important thoughts: Why is my neighbor’s car engine so loud, and what kind of bird is chirping in the tree outside of my window? I pause to send my friend a recording of the bird.
She replies that it is a mockingbird (likely mocking me, like my children) and I get back to work. She’s a Boomer now too, I assume. She recently invited me over to learn about plants — and take a few clippings.
Wild times for the Real Housewives of Pittsburgh as we all work remotely from our messy homes. I begin to mentally list the things that now piss me off: Overhead lighting, too many people talking at once, small talk at professional events (or anywhere), pants with a waistband and shoes without good arch support. I am furious that every movement in life requires a new app, deeply concerned about the safety of e-bikes and gas station drugs and the state of our local roads, and trialing my fourth set of cooling bed sheets.
I also list the things I do not care about any longer: fashion trends, what anyone else thinks of me, and the well-earned lines and wrinkles on my face. It’s a weird juxtaposition when you’re parenting in middle age, raising kids that are on the cusp of adulthood. In many ways I feel like I’m in the prime of my life.
Extract — continue reading at the source.
