I can think of more than a few men right now that I would curse. Luckily, I live in the age of Etsy witches—an extremely online phenomenon that has given us access to spell-casting supernatural divas who conveniently own online storefronts. I’ve used Etsy witches in the past.
I’ve paid for love and devotion spells (sorry to my boyfriend—but hey, it worked), success spells, and the occasional “road opener” spell to clear my path of any obstacles. And while I personally haven’t gone down the route of using a spell for someone else’s downfall, the option is definitely there (and very, very tempting these days). For some Etsy witches, cursing someone means making the target’s day slightly inconvenient.
But for others, it’s much more extreme (sickness, poverty, and sometimes even death). But I personally think current day Etsy witches could learn a thing or two from their medieval ancestors whose curses consisted of a little more pizzazz. More specifically: they would cast spells to disappear men’s penises.
In a TikTok video I’ve watched way too many times now, creator @sapphael—who regularly discusses the quirkier aspects of medieval history—highlights the most infamous witch hunting book of the 15th century: The Malleus Maleficarum by Heinrich Kramer, which translates to “the hammer of witches.” The book discusses the “crimes” of witchcraft at the time and “solidified witchcraft as a gendered crime.” Sapphael explains to Cosmopolitan that in the 11th century, the image of the devil began shifting from more of an idiotic, bumbling figure to one of extreme power and danger. Eventually, he was linked to magic, and anyone who practiced magic (or any form of heresy) was considered an associate of the devil. It was believed that witches would cause impotence among men.
And in some cases, by working with the devil, they could steal a man’s penis and make him “as smooth as a Ken doll” (Sapphael’s words) down there—typically if he had upset or wronged her. The only way to get it back would be for the man to beg the witch for forgiveness. Here’s where the medieval people really got into the weeds.
It was believed that a witch couldn’t actually disappear a man’s penis. Instead, their powers were limited to merely creating the illusion of a missing penis: This meant the man could no longer feel their genitals, and any onlooker would see nothing there as well. Now, at this time, witches were blamed for things like stillbirth, sterility, and even preventing marital relations.
Extract — continue reading at the source.
