Six months ago, I was pushed from the birth canal of college and into real adult life. Sometimes, I am kicking and screaming like a minute-old newborn, and other times, I get a little pensive. Mostly, I have been considering how much my existence has changed over these last few months.
My long-distance relationship. I started dating my boyfriend in January 2026. What could have been a simple senior-spring-fling quickly turned into something with gravitas, and I knew even after we tossed our caps that I still wanted us to be together.
Going into graduation, we knew post-grad life would have us on opposite corners of the country: me in NYC and him in San Francisco. We’ve been navigating this new terrain since June, but summer and PTO made the time more manageable. Now, with real work schedules and no syllabus promising winter break, I’m suddenly thrust into a double-whammy of an adjustment: life post grad and the perils of LDRs.
When it comes to LDRs, outsiders always claim: “It’s worth it, if it’s the right person.” “The time will be up before you know it.” “With FaceTime, it’s so easy these days.” As a physical-affection person, I beg to differ. My boyfriend and I use the TikTok hacks, the apps, and always have our next visit lined up—and it’s still super hard. I’m not alone in this either—I realized many of my coupled-up friends are in the same boat.
My roommate, whose boyfriend graduated the year before us, got a preview of this transition while she was still in college. She could build her day around classes, clubs, and spontaneous plans; he had a work calendar to answer to. It wasn’t a question of liking each other less, but suddenly they were operating on two different clocks, Ubering from Boston to New York in the dead of night just to spend a few hours together (yes, they were—and are still—that in love).
Despite what J.Lo said, I fear that love does, in fact, cost a thing, like a really large transportation budget. I get my friend’s struggle now. When you mix work, self-care, time with friends, non-dorm commute times, and familial obligations, these rock-solid collegiate relationships can slide into avalanche territory.
Extract — continue reading at the source.
