I still feel the same degree of pleasure Sex with Nina is by far the best I’ve ever had. Our intimate life is incredibly communicative, but it wasn’t always that way. We were friends who lived in a house-share together, and decided to start a relationship.
We hit an early roadblock – penetrative sex was very painful for her. After that first time, we both shut down. We were each coming to it with our own worries.
In the past, I felt anxiety about whether I was doing sex right, so I was left worrying that I had done it all wrong. Nina felt concerned that penetrative sex would feel better for me, and that without it our sex wouldn’t be good enough. We still tried penetrative sex for a bit, but it clearly wasn’t working.
It started to feel ridiculous that we were even trying. We had some productive conversations, and scribbled all our concerns down on a mind map. We looked it up, and Nina’s symptoms marry up with vaginismus, so we educated ourselves about that.
We built our sex life organically from the ground up. We would kiss and grind on each other, and we knew that felt good. Over time, she has seen how much I enjoy sex with her, which has eased her worries that I might crave anything else.
The mechanics of how we have sex don’t matter to me. I still feel the same degree of pleasure the way we do it, and I am so happy to have Nina as my partner in life and in the bedroom. Nowadays, I would say our sex life is quite mobile – we might both be on our backs or facing each other, and I might touch her from the front or wrap my arm around and touch her from behind.
Extract — continue reading at the source.
